Job Advertisment to work in Kids Ministry!

[Funny Man Dan]

Hello you fine looking people.

I would love to get a collection of what you would sum up as a Job Advertisement to work in Kids Ministry!

What would it be:
* Must have a collection of shirts that all can be ruined by being slimed.
* Sense of humour is not mandatory, but you won't survive without it
* Must know how to read......... as much as your children anyway
* Must be willing to work for a boss that never leaves you alone, yet is never seen (now I am getting deep)

So if you have a bunch or a few or even half of one (I don't know how that would work) post them now and share them with us all. I am excited to see the different range of perspective from you obviously awesome people.

Have Fun

FMD

[Tom Reusch]

*Even though you would watch them anyways, Cartoons are now considered research.
*Must be willing to get into fists fights with all the local dentists; with all the candy you hand out every week, they're gonna want a piece of you.
*Should be quick to recover when you forget a kids name: a staple of generic names such as 'Buckaroo' or 'Fella' is a must
*Must be willing to live bald, as you're most likely going to lose a challenge and have to shave it off anyways


I don't know if this is what you're looking for...but this is what you get.

[Funny Man Dan]

Ha ha.

That is exactly what I was looking for.

What a great start.

Thanks Tom :)

Who is next? They don't all have to be that funny.

Buckaroo - he he

[Rachel Onions]

* Must be versed in all current trends, able to hold 'intelligent' conversations on Ben Ten and Barbie at a moments notice and at times similtaneously
* Must not be grossed out by snot, barf, fart jokes
* Having the ability to always tell a joke or fill in time is a major plus
* No sense of embarrassment is a plus - especially when doing action songs

here's a few... IDK about them

[Tom Reusch]

*Must have the immune system of a robot
*Must have surplus-sized jugs of hand sanitizer
*Must understand that "You're just a children's pastor, and we don't allow 'that sort of behavior' in the main sanctuary!"
*Must know what the baptistery 'IS' and 'ISN'T' for!
*Must be willing to accept the blame for not being a good parent...to other peoples kids...from their parents.
*Must be willing to sleep with one eye open, because not everyone goes to bed on time at summer camp.

[Funny Man Dan]

Tom, Rachel......... you guys seem like so much fun.

Great responses.

Have Fun

FMD

[Jason Martin]

*When faced with embarrassing & awkward situations, must be able to laugh loudly even if no one else does
*Must realize that every parent believes their child is "very mature for their age" and should not have to stay in that class
*Must be willing to do and try new things even if "we've always done it this way"
*Must not be satisfied with the status quo
*Must be able to ignore foul body odors

[Rachel Onions]

LOL I love these - they are Great!!!

How about:
*Must be able when telling a story to keep the Philistines, Isralites and Midianites
* An ability to listen to childrens questions and point them towards Jesus - even when you don't have the answers.

[Andrew Whittaker]

*Must be able to use random junk as props
*Must be able to pay attention or at least pretend you are
*Must be able to throw accurately (kids are small targets at dodgeball!)
*Must be able to rig contests so the girls don't always win

[Renee Lewis]

-Must be able to "Hold it" for entire service rotation
-Ability to distinguish where "That smell is coming from"
-Able to leap small toddlers in a single bound
-Must understand the 5 second rule
-Must be able to keep up with lost tooth after placing in ziplock bag
-Ablity to remove chewing gum or gummies from hair a plus
-willingness to pray for all sick pets by name
-Must be able to step on hotwheel without zooming away
-High pitch squeals do not annoy you or give you the willys
-Return all hairbows, shoes, sippy cups, and slap frogs to original owner
-Ability to burp abc's a bonus

[Funny Man Dan]

Renee, Andrew, Jason and Rachel for the 2nd time, you guys are awesome.

Sounds like I know which ministry i have to go to for some fun.

Kids are small targets at dodgeball....... ha ha

I WANT TO HEAR MORE!!!

[Sarah Thompson]

*must be able to eat 2 dry weetbix in under a minute
*must have large lung capacity to blow up balloons - and not be too worried about the slobber all over the balloons from the kids that "gave it a go"
*must be able to jump really really high and sing really loud - in tune is optional
*must be able to find 5 different ways of communicating the same point
*absolutely must be Kingdom minded, not just a kids ministry builder

[Jonathan Cliff]

We call it the "Mirror Test". We'll hold up a mirror to your nose and if it fogs up...You're Hired!