Summertime = Playtime. Playtime = Building Relationships with Kids.

[Kristi West]

I always looked forward to that long block of time between the end of school year and
the start of school. Summertime to me meant visiting grandparents, playing outdoors,
no homework (yay!), and a change of routine. Summertime also provided lots of time to
play. Most of the time I played with a sibling, with other kids, or by myself. During the
summer, those friends and siblings were the significant people in my life–the ones who
influenced me most.

Who influences your children? Who are the significant people in your kids lives–those
who spend the most time with them? What does all of this have to do with play?

• Play is the way children learn. Think about the times you’ve played a game with
friends. You learn things about these friends during the course of playing. Everyone is
usually relaxed (unless it’s a highly competitive game), conversation flows, you observe
other people’s behavior. You’re learning all sorts of things.

• Play is the way to build relationships. When you have played a game with friends,
inevitably you have built some sort of relationship with them. Hopefully it’s a good
relationship. Nevertheless, you have shared a common experience by spending time
with each other. Shared experiences are one of the foundations of lasting
relationships.

• Play is the way to communicate effectively. During the course of a game some
sort of communication will occur. The communication may be teaching the rules of the
game to the other players. Or, if the game is less structured, someone may start up a
casual conversation about recent events. The lines of communication have opened up
in this informal setting. I don’t know about you, but whenever someone says, “We need
to talk,” I get this bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. I’ve already assumed the
conversation will be negative. However, if something comes up during the course of an
informal setting, I’m less likely to be defensive and more open to discussion.

To sum all of this up, the people who spend the most time with your children are
influencing their lives. Play is a wonderful way to become that significant person in
your own children’s lives–influencing them with your values and beliefs. (This also
applies to aunts, uncles, grandparents, and teachers.) Play is also a great way to open
the lines of communication with kids and build that relationship. So, go out and have
some fun this summer. Pull out a board game or go to the park and play some ball.
Have some fun together. Use the opportunity to open up the lines of communication by
asking questions of your kids and letting them know that you’re open to conversation.

Adapted from the Child-Sensitive Teaching Training Guide by Karyn Henley.
Originally posted on my blog at www.ChildSensitive.blogspot.com. ;